So how do you really feel about being stuck in the middle seat of an economy section on a full flight with nowhere to go? Exactly – it isn’t fun.

Now there is an “anti-seat-downer” device called the Knee Defender that is being sold online and in retailers. By having the Knee Defender, you can walk onto a plane and know that the person in front of you cannot put their seat back to disrupt you. Just a few weeks ago, a flight was diverted to an alternate airport because of an argument that ensued between the person with the device and the person in front who wanted to recline their seat back.

So where do you stand? For me, I must confess that I have become a less pleasant person when somebody on a three hour or less flight decides to throw back their seat, choking off my space. This either causes me to create an inconvenience to the person behind me or have a horrible experience for the next three hours.

I have tried, I must confess, the knee trick. With my knees, I would give a nudge here, a knee kick there, and a nasty stare as I go to the bathroom. But all I really wanted was the person in front to turn around and say, “Hey, is it cool to put my seat back?” On some budget airlines, they have solved this issue by locking the seats. It’s all about reasonableness.

It is that strange thing that happens when people get on airplanes in overcrowded situations. Normal, rational people begin to inconvenience other people by grabbing any piece of real estate they can with their elbows and sometimes even sticking their bags over in your foot position. My two cents is that this is not a luxury experience. We are all in this together and if we work as a team, everybody’s life will be made less unpleasant over the two or three hours that we have to endure bad food, bad service, an overheated cabin, and a journey that, if we could take a high speed train, we most certainly would.

Am I thinking of getting a device? No. Do I have some sympathy for the people who try to defend their position? Absolutely. And the jury is out on this, incidentally. Even my brother’s girlfriend seems to think that it’s okay to throw your seat all the way back on a short flight. Not to offer a knee jerk reaction necessarily, but breathe, do yoga, or anything. Just please do not put your seat back.